HOW TO HAVE A LIKEABLE PERSONALITY

1. Don’t express your opinion freely and unsought.

2. Don’t feel superior among your friends.

3. Once in a while, join friends or colleagues for lunch or snack.

4. Read the papers and be updated on the news that matter, so that you’ll be ready to converse with anyone at anytime.

5. Lessen the habit of borrowing.

6. Don’t be a “Dutch treat” addict.

7. Entertain once in a while, even if it costs money.

8. Don’t pride yourself upon your absolute frankness.

9. Be nice to children (not just your own).

10. Don’t keep people waiting when you have an appointment with them.

11. Dress appropriately on every occasion.

12. Never nurse grudges.

13. Do not say bad things against people behind their backs.

14. Be nice and patient to telephone operators and salesmen.

15. Keep your word. Never break it as often as you keep it.

16. Give only objective and constructive criticism. Choose words that are not demoralizing and degrading.

17. Give sincere compliments.

18. Listen when someone is talking, don’t interrupt.

19. Be genuinely happy for the success of your friends.

20. Smile.

THOUGHTS ON MARRIAGE

Here's a collection of nice quotes on marriage. Read on and ponder.. :-)

What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility.

A great marriage is not when the “perfect couple” comes together, but when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences. – Dave Meurer

That quiet mutual gaze if a trusting husband and wife is like the first moment of rest or refuge from a great weariness or a great danger. – George Eliot

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. – Phyllis Diller

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. – Mignon McLaughlin

The fulfillment of marriage is that joy in which each lover’s true being is flowering because its growth is being welcomed and unconsciously encouraged by the other in the infinite series of daily decisions which is their life together. – Neville Ward

To keep the fire burning brightly, there’s one easy rule: Keep the two logs together, near enough to keep each other warm and far enough apart – about a finger’s breadth for breathing room. Good fire, good marriage, same rule.

Between a man and his wife, nothing ought to rule but love. – William Penn

When entering into a marriage one ought to ask oneself: do you believe you are going to talking with this woman up into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory, but most of the time you are together will be devoted to conversation. – Friedrich Nietzsche

Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they’re on the same side. – Zig Ziglar

Happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love, and they blossom when we love the ones we marry. – Tom Mullen

The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds – they mature slowly. – Peter De Vries

Marriage must constantly fight against a monster which devours everything: routine. – Honore de Balzac

One advantage of marriage is that, when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. – Judith Viorst

Even if marriages are made in heaven, they all have to be maintained on earth.

The Christian is supposed to love his neighbor, and since his wife is his nearest neighbor, she should be his deepest love. – Martin Luther

Only choose in marriage a man whom you would choose as a friend if he were a woman. – Joseph Joubert

The thing that counts most in the pursuit of happiness is choosing the right companion. Remember that successful marriage depends on two things: (1) finding the right person and (2) being the right person.

Don’t marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you can’t live without. – Dr. James C. Dobson

More marriages might have survived if the couple realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse. – Doug Larson

Marriage is not just spiritual communion and passionate embraces; marriage is also three meals a day, sharing the workload and remembering to carry out the trash. – Dr. Joyce Brothers

A good marriage requires determination to be married for good.

WHO SAYS FUN SHOULD BE EXPENSIVE

Here are some fun but inexpensive ways of spending the day with your loved ones. No fancy stuff yet these are guaranteed to put a smile on your face.

1. A movie night at home: Rent videos or watch movies on cable. Make homemade popcorn.
2. Do some star gazing. Bring a blanket or sleeping bag and cuddle up in your backyard or at a nearby park.
3. Visit the zoo. For Pinoys, we have the Manila Zoo, Avilon Zoo and Ark Avilon. You may also visit the Manila Ocean Park.
4. Tour a museum.
5. Have a picnic. Pack homemade sandwiches and fruit juices.
6. On a rainy day, prepare your favorite hot chocolate at home.
7. Go to the nearest SM Mall and enjoy ice-skating, knock down some bowling pins or play bingo.
8. Rummage through a flea market or your nearest ukay-ukay store.
9. Cook dinner together and then enjoy the meal by candlelight, dressed in your finest.
10. If you have kids, have dinner with them at home, and then go out with your husband for dessert and coffee.
11. Bring out the diva in you and sing to your heart’s content on your magic mic.
12. Ride the MRT from end to end on a non-busy day.
13. Go to a playground and take turns pushing each other on the swings.
14. Go for a bike ride.
15. Enjoy the sunset.
16. Drive outside of town and pick wildflowers together.
17. Take a roadtrip at a nearby town you’ve never been to before. Drink at a local coffee shop of sample their delicacies.
18. Read aloud to each other. It may be your favorite poem, short story or something you’ve never read before.

SIMPLE JOYS: Part 4: Thoughts to Live By

*Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
*When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “why do you want to know?”
*Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
*Remember that not getting whet you want is sometimes a stroke of luck.
*Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
*When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
*Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
*Live a good life so that when your children think of fairness, caring and integrity, they will think of you.
*Don’t expect money to bring you happiness.
*Take responsibility for your life.
*Take care of your reputation.
*Live a good, honorable life. When you get older and think back, you’ll enjoy it the second time.

SIMPLE JOYS: Part 3 - For You

*Count your blessings.
*Be thankful for every meal.
*Take a nap on Sunday afternoons.
*Drink 8 glasses of water a day.
*Wave at children on the school bus.
*Leave everything a little better than when you found it.
*Wear outrageous underwear under the most formal business attire.
*Call your mother.
*Say “bless you” when you hear someone sneeze.
*Read more books and watch less TV.
*Invest in good health.
*Trust in God but lock your car.
*Pray. There’s immeasurable power in it.
*Learn and enjoy a creative hobby – paint, sew, cross-stitch, there are lots of these!
*Once a year, go some place you’ve never been before.
*Learn the rules then break some.
*Love and cook with reckless abandon.
*Drive a different route to work.
*Whistle.
*Slow dance.
*If you can, get a pet cat or dog. They will keep you company and you can practice your nurturing side on them.
*Eat a gourmet meal at a fancy restaurant.
*Never refuse homemade brownies.
*Never give anyone fruitcake.
*Sing in the shower.
*Take a bubble bath.
*Play card games.
*Play a sport.
*Watch funny movies on your DVD.
*Keep a journal.
*Don’t postpone joy.

next: Thoughts to Live By

SIMPLE JOYS: Part 2 - Your Social Life

*Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
*In disagreements, fight fairly. No name-calling.
*Don’t judge people by their relatives.
*Don’t let a little dispute ruin a great friendship.
*Never interrupt when you are being flattered. Smile and say “thank you”.
*Forgive.
*M.Y.O.B. Mind your own business.
*Once on a while, do nice things for people who will never find out.
*Remember to greet people on their birthdays.
*Never give up on anyone; miracles happen everyday.
*Say please and thank you a lot.
*Don’t rain on other people’s parade.
*Be there when people need you.
*Never deprive someone of hope. It might be all they have.
*Keep your promises.
*Don’t be afraid to say I’m sorry.
*Support your community; help in every way you can.
*Be gentle with the earth.
*Be someone’s hero.
*Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
*Vote.

next: For You

SIMPLE JOYS: Part 1 - On Love

*Believe in love at first sight.

*When you say “I love you”, mean it.

*When you say “I’m sorry”, look the person in the eye.

*Love deeply and passionately.

*If you don't end up with the one you love, remember that he might be just a marker that would lead you to where you should be or to the person whom you are supposed to be with.

*Be engaged at least 6 months before getting married.

*Marry the man/woman you love to talk to.

*In disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

*Remember that the best relationship is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.

next: Your Social Life

10 STERLING TIPS FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE

1.Love each other. Say "I love you" often and in different ways. Surprise each other with gifts of praise to show your love. Remember that love grows in an atmosphere of freedom and trust, not from restraint and obligation. Do things to keep your love and romance new and alive. Don't take things for granted. Ever.

2. Listen objectively to each other as you would to a friend. Give each other the right to disagree. You don't want anyone to control your feelings, so don't try to own the feelings of the one you love.

3. Never stop treating each other like sweethearts. Always do things to make the other one feel loved. Share the chores around the house. Work together in achieving your goals.

4. Take care of each other. Put the other one first, but don't neglect your own needs either. Do the things that show your interest in your partner's needs, desires and problems.

5. Look to each other for help. Don't let your problems or concerns get out of hand and make you go opposite directions. You're in this life together. Be thankful.

6. Talk about things together the way you would talk to a friend. Absolutely refuse to say anything negative about your partner. Share your most important secrets, and never betray the secrets of your partner. Don't ever give up on your love.

7. Settle the fact that you've made your choice and you're no longer looking for anyone else. Don't flirt, think of the consequences. Don't consider it.

8. Be in agreement about how your money is spent. Talk about how to manage your finances.

9. When in doubt, ask yourself how you would want to be treated and then act accordingly. If you've argued, never go to sleep withut a resolution.

10. Add humor into your daily life. Have fun!

HOW TO STAND OUT AND GET NOTICED

Take the time to look great!
Make an effort to wear something that will bring out your flattering features, and for ladies, do not be afraid to put makeup on. This will make you feel confident, and, as we all know, confident people attract attention.

Put a smile on your face
Smiling makes you look approachable and fun, qualities that will draw people close.

Make eye contact
Eye contact is a powerful form of non-verbal communication. Making eye contact shows that you are sincere and secure.

Go ahead and participate
If you are at a party, don’t just stay in one corner – mingle, chat or dance! If you’re in a meeting, participate! These seemingly simple actions will get people to notice you.

Use your sense of humor
People love to laugh. This makes us forget all the bad things and just relax.

HOW TO ACHIEVE SELF POWER

1. Don’t be afraid to approach prominent people. Ask them about their success. Listen carefully to their answers, write them down for future reference and application in your own life.

2. Use motivators to help you succeed. Here are some examples:

POSITIVE THINKING
VISUALIZATION
AFFIRMATIVE REPETITION
DYNAMIC FIRST IMPRESSIONS

3. First impressions are important. You are your own “best” or “worst” walking advertisement. Create an effective “hello”. Dress up your image so that others are impressed by you.

4. Select a hero or role model and emulate his or her outstanding attributes. Picture in your mind’s eye the strength of character and leadership qualities of your selected role model, then picture yourself as one possessing these desirable traits.

HOW TO HAVE FAITH IN YOURSELF

1. Think success and believe that you are capable of being successful.

2. Cease to think in terms of what you cannot do, but in terms of what you can do. Never think failure, failure is anti-faith.

3. Believe BIG. The size of your success in not determined by the size of your brain, but by the size of your faith. Think BIG achievements and back them with BIG faith.

4. Affirm this belief: “Faith is an attitude of mind. Faith is belief in myself, things, other people, and God. I live in faith.”

5. Never compare yourself or your achievements with others, but make your comparisons only with yourself.
A sign of mental health is to be glad when others achieve, and to rejoice with them.

6. When opportunity appears, hold the deep conviction that, “This is right for me, I will succeed!”.

THE 90/10 PRINCIPLE

According to Dr. Stephen Covey, 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react…

What does this mean?

We really have NO control
over 10% of what happens to us.


We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off.
A driver may cut us off in the traffic.

We have NO control over this 10%.

The other 90% is different.
You determine the other 90%.

How?... By your reaction.

You cannot control a red light.
However, you can control your reaction.

Do not let people fool you.
YOU can control how you react.

Let us use an example…


You are having breakfast with your family.
Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee
Onto your business shirt.

You have no control over what has just happened.

What happens next
will be determined by how you react.

You curse.
You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over.
She breaks down in tears.

After scolding her, you turn to your wife
and you criticize her for placing the cup
too close to the edge of the table.
A short verbal battle follows.


You storm upstairs and change your shirt.
Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying
to finish her breakfast and getting ready to go to school.
She misses the bus.
Your spouse must leave immediately for work.
You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school.

Because you are late, you drive 40 miles per hour in a 30 mph speed limit zone.
After a 15-minute delay and throwing
$60.00 traffic fine away, you arrive at school.
Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye.

After arriving at the office 20 minute late,
You realize you forgot your briefcase.

Your day has started terrible.
As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse.
You look forward to coming home.

When you arrive home, you find a small wedge
in your relationship with your wife and daughter.

Why?
Because of how you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is “D”
You had no control over what happened with the coffee.

How you reacted in those 5 seconds
is what caused your bad day.



Here is what could have and should have happened.

Coffee splashes over you.
Your daughter is about to cry.

You gently say:
“It’s okay, honey, you just need to be
More careful next time.”

Grabbing a towel you go upstairs and change your shirt.
You grab your briefcase, and you come back down in time to look through
the window and see your child getting on the bus.
She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early a cheerfully greet the staff.

Notice the difference?
Two different scenarios.
Both started the same.
Both ended different.
Why?
Because of how you reacted.


You really have no control over 10% of what happens in your life.
The other 90% was determined by your reaction.

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 Principle.

If someone says something negative about you,
do not be a sponge.
Let the attack roll off like water on glass.
You do not have to let the negative comments affect you.

React properly and it will not ruin your day.
A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, or getting stressed out.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in the traffic?


Do you lose your temper?
Pound on the steering wheel? (a friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off),
Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket?
Who cares if you arrive 10 seconds later at work?
Why let the cars ruin your drive?

Remember the 90/10 Principle
and don’t worry about it.

You are told you lost your job.
Why lose sleep and get irritated?
It will work out.

Use your worrying energy and time
to find a new job.


The plane is late. It is going to mangle your schedule for the day.

Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant?
She has no control over what is going on.

Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger, why stress out?
It will just make things worse.
Now you know the 90/10 Principle.
Apply it and you will be amazed at the results.
You will lose nothing if you try it.

The 90/10 Principle is incredible.
Very few know and apply this Principle.

The result?

You will see it by yourself!

Millions of people are suffering
from undeserved stress,
trials, problems and headaches.

We all must understand and apply the
90/10 Principle.
It can change your life!

…Enjoy it...

It only takes willpower to give ourselves
permission to make the experience.

Absolutely everything we do, give, say, or even think, it’s like a Boomerang.
It will come back to us...



If we want to receive, we need to learn to give first...
Maybe we will end with our hands empty,
but our heart will be filled with love...

And those who love life,
have that feeling marked in their hearts …

BULLETIN FOR A HEALTHIER, HAPPIER LIFE!

more veggies, less meat. . . .

more vinegar, less salt. . .

more fruits, less sweetener. . .

more water, less soda. . .

chew more, eat less. . .



more deeds, less talk. . .

more sharing, less desires. . .

more walks, less rides. . .

more laughters, less anger. . .

more friends, less enemies. . .

more appreciation, less criticism. .. .

more sleeps, less gimmicks. . .

more visions, less disappointments. . .

more prayers, less worries.

MAKING YOUR SICK BED SOFTER

From “Tomorrow Can Be Beautiful” and “Just For Today” by Harold J. Sala


On his sickbed prior to death, Charles Spurgeon said, “If you do not wish to be full of regret when you are forced to lie still, work while you can. If you desire to make a sickbed as soft as it can be, do not stuff it with mournful reflections that you wasted time when you were in health and strength.”

Here are four guidelines for living a life without regrets:

1. Plan it now. Some things you can’t do now, but you can prepare to do then when the right time comes.


2. Do it now. Don’t wait until you retire. To start a hobby, take a trip, or remodel the house.


3. Say it now. Tell your spouse and your kids that you love them.


4. Live it now. Make your peace with God now, not in your deathbed.

ON ATTAINING TRUE HAPPINESS

1. Be grateful. Begin the day with thanksgiving, for another opportunity at life unfolds.

2. Live a Simple Life. Make your habits reasonable. Avoid selfishness and self-centeredness. Simplify your daily plans and activities. You are less likely to be disappointed and frustrated if you keep things simple and attainable.

3. Spend less than you earn. We hear this over and over. It may be difficult, as more often, it is tempting to splurge than to spend within our budget. Living within or below our means will earn us dividends in the long run, and will keep us out of stress-causing debts.

4. Be objective and constructive. Always look at the logic and rationale behind things. Think clearly and accurately, without the clouds of emotions and subjective thoughts.

5. Resist the tendency to always want and do things your own way. It also pays to consider the viewpoint of others.

6. Rule your emotions. Cultivate a disposition of peace, goodwill and happiness.

7. Be generous. The way to be truly happy is to make others happy.

8. Live one day at a time. Plan your activities for the day – focus on the most important task but don’t forget to set aside a schedule for the things that you enjoy doing.

BOREDOM-BUSTERS

1. Don’t be a couch potato. Watch television less. Instead, go for a walk, see a movie, play sports or be with friends.

2. Break that routine once in a while. Hire a baby-sitter, or take a day off from work, and have a delightful lunch out- or go window-shopping. Doing spontaneous things brings instant happiness to our day.

3. Call a friend. Chat on the phone or invite your friend for coffee.

4. Allot a “me-hour” each day to do only the things you want – read, listen to your favorite CD, re-do your hair, polish your nails, or just sit quietly and think.

5. Laugh. See the funny side of life. The more you laugh, the less bored you will be.

6. Give your home an occasional face-lifting. You need not spend anything for this. You may r e-arrange your furniture, change your curtains or put indoor plants.

7. Have a recreational activity that you really enjoy. Our hobbies and recreational activities should be those that give us a “high”, and not something that we ought to do just because our spouse or our children said so.

8. Change the way you do your work. Repetitious chores can be fun if you keep your mind active while engaged in them. For example, devise ways in making dusting and cleaning to make it easier, better or shorter.

9. Watch your appearance. Keep yourself attractive with a new hairdo every now and then, or change the way you part your hair. Wear accessories to update and upgrade your clothes.

10. Have more family fun. Include your children and your spouse in even the simplest chore. You may take them along to the grocery store, have picnic with them in the park, or play board games together.

11. Cultivate new friendships. People who have genuine interest in people seldom get bored. Have a small talk with your manicurist, your barber or your doctor’s assistant. Conversing with people allow us to get to know them on a deeper level.

A GUIDE ON HOW TO ACHIEVE PEACE OF MIND

1. Learn the art of forgiveness. Don’t hold grudges. Grudges drain our energy without us knowing it. A person who knows how to forgive is free from the negative effects of resentment.

2. Learn from your mistakes. Forget the blunders of the past and commit to learn from the errors that you’ve made.

3. Compete with yourself, not with someone else. Trying to keep up with others merely forces you to play second best. Instead, focus on ways to improve yourself based on your standards and you’ll find joy in the fulfillment it brings.

4. See yourself at your best. Don’t torture yourself with frustrations and disappointments. Choose to focus on your good qualities and your talent. Live for the fun of today instead of looking back at the regrets of yesterday.

5. Conserve energy.

a. Do not rush – work, eat, play, sleep leisurely
b. Do not consume your energy on work or play – reserve some for other worthwhile activities
c. Avoid the excesses and do things in moderation – eat, drink, work, play, everything
d. Say no. Do not be afraid to decline requests that you deem unimportant or burdensome.

6. Stay calm and serene. Do not fret or worry. Too much of heavy emotion sucks up our peace of mind.

a. Past is past and you can never bring it back
b. Do your best today and let it go at that
c. Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself – most worries never come to pass
d. Put your trust in God and forget all your fears. If God is with you, who will be against you?

Remember that with peace of mind comes the power to live life more effectively.

YOUR DAILY REQUIREMENTS FOR LIVING

1. Love. We cannot survive a day without it. It may be your love for your spouse, kids, parents, siblings, friends, relatives, neighbors or pets.

2. Security. Be it financial, emotional or spiritual, security provides us peace of mind.

3. Creativity. We need to express who we are and what we are made of in this world, be it through our work, the music we play, our passion for the arts, or even our love of food. Self-expression allows us to live instead of letting life just pass us by as if we are life’s idle bystanders.

4. Recognition. We need to be accepted and appreciated, not just by others but ultimately, by ourselves.

5. Goals. Reaching our goals gives us satisfaction and enhances our self-worth. This also brings personal success and maturity.

6. New experiences. Do or learn something new everyday. This allows us to grow and appreciate life more.

7. Be involved. Look out for opportunities to help. It need not be through financial or monetary ways. You can also help by sharing your talents, your skills or your knowledge.

8. Forgiveness. Forgiving others rids us of the emotional baggage that hinders us from having a peaceful life.

9. Rising above a mistake. Do not be hard on yourself when you commit errors in life. Forgive yourself and remember that what’s important is you learn something from your mistake and commit do better next time.

10. Relax. After an exhausting day, we owe it to ourselves to wind down, rid ourselves of tensions and recharge our energies.

11. Share your happiness with others. Happiness is contagious. A happy person radiates happiness wherever he goes.